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Thrudball 2010 Bush Tucker Trial

Right to Left: Val Catella, Ken Neal and Mike Ragless

For 2010 we had three brave volunteers, Mike Ragless(Left), Ken Neal (middle) and Val Catella (Right).

Mike had gained a few sponsors, and Ken and Val had a whip-round the pub. When I announced this, Val piped up "I'm just hungry"

Val U wanna go 1St? "Nah, Ken's got the Experience"So guys, all this Bush Tucker is prepared by an Qualified Army Chef with survival expertise , so is all safe, but you MUST follow the instructions.

Ok, so first on the Menu is Yellow Locusts ...my main concern here is when I open this box the buggers are gonna jump so you gotta GRAB it ...

Val do you wanna go first?..."nah ken's got the experience "

1,2,3...CATCH!

Ready...123 CATCH!

Do we eat the head or the body?

You have to pinch the head off then chew chew chew..."what, the HEAD? " they all chorus back to me

What, the HEAD?

No Remorse...YEAHHHH, and THAT is how it's done...kens an old pro at this ...

old pro

Val's Locust is using it's dodge skill.."C'mere you bitch!" Dont forget to chew...WHY? "cos the wing's will stickin yer Froat"

Yuuuummmm!!!NOT!

Go on Michael, get a nice fat juicy one...AAAARRRRGGGGGHHHH get that thing away from me!" screams mikes other half...

mouth full of locust

Ken says the legs are like chewing brambles..

locust legs like chewing brambles

Next up are Crickets ...smaller, jump more, even harder to get hold of..but you dont have to pull the heads off...

Val man's up and goes first...there's uite a few in there, honest...they're hiding from you...

2 minutes later they are still evading val so mike pipes up "just devour them all"

C'Mere, You Buggers!

Finally val successfully collars one...oops! theres one there...more screams from the girls..."Tread on it, Tread on it, Tread on it"

Don't tread on it, EAT IT

Cricket...Tastes just like chicken

hum...tastes like chicken...

...that is, chicken with an exoskeleton!

...chicken with an exoskeleton...

Mealy Worms, Oh Goody!Next are Mealy Worms ... take the heads off and chew..."we ate them whole last year" shouts Mark Claridge...

Look at the SIZE of em, they'll bite BACK!yeah Mark, but look at the size of these buggers, they'll bite back!

all together...321GO

Mike is first up to the plate, ken and he count "321go" and munch "woorrh, they're CRUNCHY, they pops in your mouths" says mike

"Do you wanna kiss?" he asks his missus

Val's Mealy worm is armour plated, and it takes him quite a while to peel it's head off...

There you are, Girls...AAARRRGGGHHH

Frank suddenly swings the container in the direction of the females..."there you are girls " MORE screams

pops in yer mouths

no sooner has it gone in, val says "Uuhh" and doubles over...we all edge backwards out of vomit-spatter range

Can-O-SnailsAh, we're on Snails now, this is from a "can-o-snails"

Val takes a whiff...Val makes the fatal mistake of pondering what they smell of...

they REEEKKK!Val turns away in disgust, and turns a pale kermit-green shade, put holds it down...THEN Mark says "DON'T smell 'em"

taste as bad as they smell

Jimmy Gradwell is obviously not enjoying Val's decision at all...

Remember the bowl is here if you're feeling a bit nauseous...which I would understand

C'com, we got this...Mucho Cohones, the 3 Musketeers!

But all three brave souls man up again, mucho cohones...the three mustekeers.!

On 3 or after 3?

I reckon do it together on the count of three "what, on 3 or after 3?" quips Ken.

Do we have to chew em? No, they're DEAD already...Do we have to chew these,? No they're Dead already .Mike can smell them from 3 feet away...

into the MAW

Mark ays "Chew it, you gotta chew it" Mike drops his into "the maw "

WIping on the wall, going back for more, looking for a drink

Mike wipes the slime from his mouth onto the wall, val looks for a drink, Ken goes back for more...

You can't stop yourself...Ken you ARE the BUGMAN...they're Really NICE...

Val thinks they taste like rubber(won't ask what you've been eating Val)

Wimpy Postman story

Something's leaked out of one of the containers...oh theres quite a funny story, Alan posted it and one of the containers leaked, the postie turns up an say's "what Is it love, it smells AWFUL"and my missus says "it's bushtucker", so the postie goes "Whooooh" drops it and goes skipping off down the path....

dried worms..."Oh Noooooo!"

Next is ...just normal worms...these are dead...Mike says "why, it's betta when they wiggle" no, these are the dried one, well and truly dead

I'm not too sure I can keep this down...

Take just a pinch, they are quite a strong flavour so I'm told...mike and Ken like these, but Val is looking much more tentative...

Worms are nice but snails are better..."Are you a Praying Mantis Or summink?"

Ken says "these are nice but the snails are better"...I say, "are you a praying mantis or something!"

Next are Wax worms...Mike pipes up and says "I'm going to Shit Larvae for months"

don't mind the woms but not eating wood shavings

Ken doesn't mind the worms but doesn't want to eat wood shavings...

pop in your mouth

One of the girls pipes up "Has mike taken a few? Yeah, he's taken a handful" Mike says" they're like sweencorn kernels, they just POP in your mouth"

Gentlemen your starters are done, Your main course consists of Kangaroo Loins "as in B*****ks" says Val...

Now this is RAW ...."OOOooorrrr" moans Val...

like sweetcorn

Dave Candlish watches Mike launch himself in and says "How keen are you?"

Ken tongues the Kangaroo Loin Meat

Ken starts makeing whooopee with his meat using his tongue, not surprisingly gathering a giggle from the wimmin in the process...

Mike "Give it to me RAW and WRIGGGLLLing" RaglessMike "give it to me raw and wwwwrrrriiigggglling" Ragless

Mike goes for seconds, it's delicious! Must be all the 'Roo love-seed, Mike ...

LOVE that Roo Love-Seed, Eh, Mike?Actually the loin isn't testicle it's muscle...but it's had sweaty kangaroo ball-sac next to it...now, that I can cope with says ken

It'sa like anaemic fillet steak...

Next up is Alans Special Stew ...this wasn't my idea ...Ken immediatey says it smells like dogfood...

The Yelow Jelly is probably PISS

It's got jelly in it...Mike Quips " Thats probably piss"

Right I'm not going to tell you what it is, I'm going to give you clues...

Ken goes "Urgh, is it DOGmeat?" no and NO NOT a good idea for next year either...

top breeders recommend it...What? It really IS Pedigree Chum?

NO, wait, Dog Food...Pedigree chum "Bang on !" says Mark.Ken says "...what? it really is Pedigree Chum?!" Val and Ken beam